


A Hard Place

by kathkin



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (1963)
Genre: (nothing graphic) - Freeform, Childbirth, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-09-27
Updated: 2015-09-27
Packaged: 2018-04-23 15:59:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4882996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kathkin/pseuds/kathkin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stuck between a wall of ice and an army of alien warthogs, the Doctor, Ben, Polly and Jamie find themselves with a crisis on their hands. In which Ben doesn't know much about babies, the Doctor knows even less, and Jamie knows a lot about cows.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Hard Place

This, Ben reckoned, had to be about the definition of a rock and a hard place. Icy mountains up ahead and an encroaching army of alien warthogs at their backs. They were pinned in place till the wall of ice melted and their little outpost turned into an island. Then, the Doctor said, the mountains would be passable – and the army would start moving. It wouldn’t be long. The Doctor said the mountains froze and thawed on a fifteen-day cycle.

The _last_ thing they needed was another crisis.

The Doctor stood in one of the cramped bedrooms, fingers knitted together, practically hopping from foot to foot in his anxiety. “Well, that’s about the long and short of it.” Cold wind battered the windows. Polly was shivering. Ben reached down and tried to surreptitiously turn up the heater. They were meant to be keeping it on low to save energy. “Now, ah – I don’t suppose any of you know anything about delivering babies?”

They stared at him, blankly appalled. “You _can’t_ be serious, mate,” said Ben. “You must know somethin’ about it?” He was a _Doctor_ , for crying out loud. Sure, he wasn’t that sort of Doctor, but he knew some medicine, didn’t he?”

The Doctor spread his hands. “Not a thing.” He looked at their dismayed faces. “Really? No-one?”

Then Jamie piped up, “do cows count?”

Ben and Polly shifted their stare from the Doctor to Jamie. “ _C-cows_?” shuddered Polly.

Jamie shrugged. “Aye.”

The Doctor shifted from foot to foot. He rubbed a hand thoughtfully over his mouth. “That’ll have to do.” He swooped down and snatched Jamie’s arm. “Come on.”

“Hey, what – I don’t know how to –” Jamie’s protests fell on deaf ears as the Doctor bundled him out the door.

Ben and Polly watched them go. “That p-poor baby,” said Polly.

“Yeah. And poor Magda,” said Ben. Although, looking on the bright side – if they all survived, quite a story to tell.

Resolute, Polly stood. “I’m going to g-go and see if there’s any hot water,” she said. “That’s what you’re meant to do, isn’t it? Hot water?”

“If you say so,” said Ben. “‘Ere, I’ll give you a hand.”

Shuffling down the stairs, they passed the other bedroom. The Doctor and Jamie’s raised voices carried through the thin wood. “Well, if it’s a cow, ye _pull it out_.”

“Is that what you do with humans, then?”

“I dinnae _think_ so.”

Magda’s voice rang out over them both. “Will you two _shut up_?”

Yeah, Ben decided. It was probably best he stay as far away as possible till it was all over. Problem was he couldn’t get that far away without leaving the outpost, so he settled for sitting downstairs, watching the gaggle of kids they’d collected and chatting to Polly while she ducked in and out with water and a basin and supplies from the medical box.

By the time the yelling and the swearing and the thumping up and down the stairs had died down, it was almost dawn, the kids had all dropped off, and Polly had fallen asleep in a chair by the heater. He made sure she was tucked in proper and set about making tea.

Upstairs, Magda was curled up asleep, the Doctor had vanished, and Jamie was sitting at the foot of the bed, a bewildered expression on his face and a tiny, wrinkled thing wrapped in a blanket in his arms.

“Alright, mate,” said Ben cheerily.

Jamie looked at him as if he was about to say something, but instead he sort of shrugged. He motioned at the baby in his arms, making vague, overwhelmed noises.

“Sounded rough,” said Ben, trying not to look too hard at the contents of the basin in the corner.

Jamie found his voice. “Could’ve been worse.” The baby made a soft, hiccupping noise. Jamie hugged it closer. “She’s so little.” He looked like he knew what he was doing so Ben didn’t really want to interfere, but he was also looking wistfully at the tea.

“Brought you some tea,” he said.

“Thanks,” said Jamie. “I, erm –” He shifted the baby in his arms, trying vainly to free a hand.

“I’ll trade you,” said Ben.

It took them a few seconds of fumbling to realise that wasn’t going to work either. Ben put both mugs of tea on the table and held out his hands for the baby.

“Gently, aye?” said Jamie as he handed her over.

“I know how to hold a baby, mate,” said Ben, though in truth he hadn’t held one since – actually he wasn’t sure he remembered. It didn’t seem so hard, though. She was only tiny and so long as he kept his arm under her head it’d probably be fine.

Jamie was staring at him as he fumbled, giving Ben the same sort of look Ben might give him when he couldn’t work out how to switch a torch on or thought there must be tiny horses inside a car. “You alright there?”

“I’m not so good with babies,” Ben confessed. “Don’t really know what to do with them.”

“Oh, aye,” said Jamie, sipping his tea with the air of an expert.

And bloody hell, maybe he was an expert. It wasn’t as if Ben knew much of anything about Jamie’s old life. “Er – you don’t – have any – do you?”

Jamie choked on his tea. “What –”

“Just askin’ cause – ”

“Why’d you –”

“Sorry –”

“Lord, _no_ ,” said Jamie.

“Right,” said Ben.

“I’ve got nieces and nephews,” said Jamie.

“Ohh,” said Ben. “I see.” Alright, that made a lot more sense.

Outside, somebody stumped up the stairs. The Doctor shambled in, elbowing the door open, carrying a box he’d outfitted into a makeshift crib. “Here we are, Jamie,” he said. “Oh, hallo, Ben.”

“Morning,” said Ben. Dawn was breaking around the thin curtains.

“Is it,” said Jamie muzzily, rubbing his eyes.

“Get some sleep, mate,” said Ben as the Doctor positioned the box beside the bed. “You look half dead.” He put the sleeping baby very gently in the box, feeling a bit like he was acting out the world’s weirdest nativity scene.

“Yes, you both get some sleep.” The Doctor crouched beside the box, peering at the baby as if it was some alien creature. “I’ll watch this little fellow.”

“It’s a girl,” said Jamie.

“Oh, yes. So it is.”

Jamie swigged his tea and stood up, swaying slightly. “Wake me if there’s trouble.” Ben wasn’t sure if he meant with the baby or the army of warthogs or both. 

The door clicked closed behind him. Magda turned over, sighing to herself.

“They’re such funny little things, aren’t they?” The Doctor reached into the box to poke the baby. “Fascinating.”

“Yeah, I ‘spose.” Ben wondered if the Doctor was just really, _really_ eccentric or if he actually came from some place where they didn’t have babies. “I’m turning in.”

“See you in the morning,” said the Doctor, far too cheerful for a man who’d been up all night.

“It _is_ the morning, mate,” said Ben.

“So it is,” said the Doctor, beaming down at the baby.

Ben rolled his eyes. “See you later, then.”

In the bedroom, Jamie was already asleep, sprawled on his stomach on one of the narrow beds. Grinning, Ben kicked off his shoes and threw himself down on the other bed. He had a feeling everything was going to work out alright.


End file.
